Opinions Wanted!

[Nic]

I never thought buying Christmas presents for a four year old would be quiet so difficult, but surprise! I wanted to buy my daughter that V-Tech video game system for kids (its a learning system) but after reading up on review I discovered it's not only expensive but unreliable, so scratch that idea.

I had to run to the pet store today to buy our cats some food (don't worry this is related to the Christmas gift). I like to let my daughter look around the store while we're there, but usually its on the weekends when the kittens are there for adoption. Since this is Tuesday there were no cats and we looked at rabbits, ferrets, birds, fish, and reptiles instead.

She became fascinated by the beta fish and I thought, HEY! Maybe I could get her a fish for Christmas! We even saw a Sponge bob Beta fish tank in the shape of the pineapple house. I had to talk it over with the bf first but he didn't like the idea of buying her something that's living.

She was also really fascinated by the hermit crabs and I though they might be an even better idea. I wont have to worry about her trying to pick them up because she knows the pinch, but she likes to watch them. They're extremely easy to take care of too.

The boyfriend didn't like this idea either. He thinks she's too young to have a pet and that she doesn't deserve one.His feeling is that she doesn't know how to care for animals, she chases the cats, and she is generally being a bad girl anyways (not cleaning the room, leaving caps off her markers and getting them on the carpet).

My thought is that its a good way for me to teach her how to take care of a pet. The bf thinks she should stay away from animals until she can learn to be around them but I think you have to get her around animals so you can teach her. Kids don't just know how to be good with animals you have to show them. I think his "keep her away" approach is going to make her resent animals and letting her have her own pet will teach her more respect for them.

I wanted to ask you guys your opinion on this matter. Do you think she's too young? Should I be waiting until she's older to introduce her to caring for her own pet? Is the bf right? He thinks it will be dead in three days or I'll end up doing all the work myself.

Or do you agree with my point of view that a low maintenance pet like a hermit crap is a good way to teach a child love of animals. I don't think she's too young to learn, I actually think I should have done it sooner.

[Tod]

We were faced with this same dilemma, and my wife and I ultimately decided to wait.

We were glad we did, even at age 7, our daughter was barely ready to care for her own pet. She has made great strides though, and is doing much better now.
All kids are different, and some may be more responsible than others, but generally speaking I would say that 4 is probably too young for that much responsibility. IMHO

[Svetlana]

LOL! My son has had BOTH a beta fish AND hermit crabs!
Pull up a chair and let me tell you about them

BETA FISH:
Super easy to care for. My son was somewhere around 4 when we bought him one. As you probably know, they don't like company! So, it's not one of those fish that you'll be stuck with spawn after spawn after spawn and 20 yrs later you still have the tank full of fish
Their habitats are likewise easy. I read that they are indegenous to the dark waters and ponds surrounding the Amazon... they don't mind the darkness and they certainly don't need a big tank. The SpongeBob one would be great for both the fish and your for your little girl's enjoyment. Our beta was in a tank designed by National Geographic and had a peeking tube, volcano, etc.. any tank that's in the range of $10-20 is probably perfect for a beta.
They often don't live long- HOWEVER, our fish just died a few weeks ago after nearly 2 years. I would highly recommend getting the air filter in the tank- all of the betas that live with the bubbles seem to last much longer than those just put in a stagnant bowl/tank.
They require little food. So little that it's actually scary There would be days and days that the fish would not eat and I thought he would starve- but never fear, one little pellet of food a week later and he was good to go.


HERMIT CRABS:
We've gone through four of these. Unlike beta fish, they are VERY social. They really need another crab or two in the tank w/ them, otherwise it's just cruel and unusual punishment They are also very easy to care for, but they certainly take more care than a beta fish. W/ our fish, I only cleaned his tank once every three weeks, if that (w/ the air filtration, mind you). W/ hermit crabs, at least weekly is advisable. They also need to be kept warm. We had one die on us when we went away for a few days one Christmas- he had his food and water there, but it just go too cold in the house for it.
Their lifespan varies- the shortest one we had was for about 6 months. The longest lasted a little over a year.
Their habitat is what you make of it- and my son has always had a good time choosing things to put into the tank for them. Sand and/or woodchips is a must. They burrow under. Things to climb is also good- as they live in palm trees in the wild. There are many things that are pretty cheap that I'm sure your daughter would enjoy choosing for them.

All in all, we chose both the beta and the hermit crabs precisely b/c we didn't want bigger pets (I'm not keen on picking up cra* and my husband is allergic to cats and dogs anyway) and we wanted something that our little boy could pretty much care for himself (although of course I always supervised).

sry, long read Hope it helps

[Nic]

I really liked the Beta fish idea but I'm not to keen on cleaning the fish tank. I remember when I had my own fish tank and what a pain in the *** it was. Since she's four I'll be the one cleaning it. Of course my fish tank when I was little was salt water so that took a lot more work...

I talked to my grandmother on the phone, I figured she was a good person to ask since she's raised 7 children and owns a farm. She's got info and both kids an animals, perfect! She told me no one hermit crabs because they're "a pain in the ***." She suggested a turtle instead and actually thinks it's a great idea to get her a pet. They live for many many years, they're easy to take care of, and they're cute! I like the idea but the bf is still having some trouble with the whole idea.

[A2rider]

Turtles carry e-coli bacteria, so if you get one, make sure your daughter washes her hands everytime she handles it.

[vulcan500rider]

TOO YOUNG - a 4 year old loses interest in things very quickly so unless you want a new pet to take care of....pass on live presents.

[bleached_baboon]

I would avoid turtles and tortoises. Like the previous poster said, water turtles can carry e-coli which might not be the best thing. The biggest issue is life expectancy. Turtles and tortoises live forever. If you get her a tortoise, it might even outlive her. Although they are very low maintenance, they are a more adult pet as they are interesting but not interactive. A child might love one at first but I think would grow tired of in a few weeks or months.

[JoyRider]

Nic, We have an 18 month old granddaughter, she has been raised with 3 cats,10 gold fish and at our house we have a 65 lb Siberian Husky she absolutely adores. She does not pull hair and is really very loving to all the animals. Children have to be shown how to care for animals. So if you expect her to take care of the animals, that won't happen till she is about 20 yrs old. They can share in the care of the animals. If YOU want to help her take care of something then I don't think there is anything wrong in that but I agree you want to be careful what you get. Goldfish are a great 1st pet...and when they die you can easily get replacements.

[Kevorkian]

4 years old is kind of young for responsibilities. But....
It is a great bonding experience if you both work with her on it.

It can go both ways, it really is up to you and your BF.

It is like baking cookies, yeah, a 4 yr old is too young to bake cookies, but if you do it as a family, it is hella fun.

*edit - I do like V-Tech

[FTM650]

Speaking from experience of getting a 5 yr old fish...don't do it. It's more pain then it's worth. Of course, a small tank with just one fish would be better then our 20 gal one that we got with 8 fish that died on us within months. Changing the water was SUCH A PAIN! then all the stuff you have to buy to keep the water just right so the fish DONT die...omg...what a mistake. Never again will I get fish! Get a cat. Litter train it. much better

[Nic]

I'm actually leaning towards getting her the beta fish. It's something small that we can take care of together and she can learn the lesson of caring for a pet. Sure I'll be responsible for it but if it teachers her a little more respect for animals it's worth it. As much as I love the turtle idea I think I'll save it for when she's much older and she understands how long they live.

[Kevorkian]

Anything you get her, depends on the time you want to spend with that item. She is too young to be responsible, but it is a great time to start teaching her that.

It is all a matter of how much time you want to put into it.

Kids grow up fast, don't waste it.

[always1sb]

Ok well this is the world according to me. I have a four year old daughter. In our house we have one dog and one cat. My four year old helps to take care of both of our pets. She understands if the animals need food they need to be fed. Usually I will let her know and she is more than happy to take care of the feeding or watering. It makes her feel important. Kids can be 12 years old and still don't know how to be responsible enough to take care of an animal. You have to teach them, the only way to teach them is for them to be responsible for an animal. It should be on your daughters comprehenshion (oops). She will probably be happy to take care of an animal. It will teach her a lesson either way you look at it.

my daughters v-smile she has had for a year she loves it. even her 9 year old brother plays it sometimes

Good Luck

[ShellB340]

I got my kids(6,3yrs) the v-smile last year they love it and I thought that it was worth the money and when they get bored of it I can buy more cartridges. We just recently(sept) got a kitten. My daughter Katelyn is 6 and every morning before school she feeds the cat. My son he thinks that he can carry him around wherever he goes. I have to get after him all the time over the cat sometimes he gets too mean. Hope this helps

[ervins]

We have 3 hermit crabs. Paris, Diamond, and Bush...They are easy enough for a youngster to take care of.