Ever leave your kids at home?

[predfan2001]

Well being a single dad with visitation every other weekend, I've found myself leaving the boys at home from time to time....like during summer break and even when I have to run errands. My ex does the same thing....the boys are very responsible (15 & 17) and we've been doing this for maybe the last 2-3 years.

I'm sure alot of people do this but last night I got a big surprise when I did it. I ran up to Wendys (about a mile from home) and left my youngest at home....the older was at work. I thought I had my cell phone in my pocket but actually it was a folding allen wrench set opps! I was gone for maybe 15-20 minutes, I pull in to find an ambulance in the drive. Turns out my son had jumped off his bed and dislocated his knee. He called me...no luck. Called 911...then called his mom but in the pain, she thought he said he burnt his leg then he hung up. So from there it got CRAZY....she shows up in hysterics but after a ride to the local hospital and getting it reset, all is good.

Never dreamed of something like that happening in 15 minutes.

[wild_deuce03]

I leave my kids home alone all the time. My oldest is 14 and she watches them. That sucks about your sons knee but don't be too hard on yourself. That could have happened even if you were there.

[evmo]

I was left home alone for hours at a time since I was about 12. I never caused problems though all I wanted to do was play video games and look at my stash of girly magazines .

[jbsmd]

Only takes a moment whether your're there or not. My kids were always getting hurt and they were never left alone.

[polizei]

No biggie, the important thing is, he is responsible and smart enough to call 911 when he doesn't have another resort! You should kindly teach him when and when not to call 911 though. It's not fun to get a call of a young child hurt.

-Cody

[gdhugh]

Boys will be boys. It's just the way it is. At that age, when an idea pops in theri head they will sometime act on it. It's like the little voice that says "don't do it" is sleeping. I'm think like others, it could have happened even if you where there. Too bad you didn't have your phone with you. I bet his mom is gonna be hard to deal with for a while after she got that phone call.
I hope she's a reasonable one. I know my EX is not so I wish you the best.
Also, I'm sure his knee will heal. Some lessons are learned the hard way that's just part of growing up.

[Neverdun]

I wanted to leave mine at the bus stop a bunch of times

[jeffs99vulcan]

It can happen in a split second, let alone 15 minutes. But I strongly believe you can't live your life worrying about what "could" happen. Be as responsible as you can be, and that will reduce as much circumstance as possible, but unless you put them in a bubble...

Case in point, my parents had our boys this weekend... they live on a hobby farm and the kids (5 and 7-1/2) LOVE it there, and I think the exposure to it is GREAT for them... they know more about farming than any kids in their classes...

This weekend, my Dad had them out helping fell trees, and cut and pile the wood (doing only the things that kids that age can do), and the youngest was climbing in a pile of branches... he slipped and scraped his neck on a twig... not enough to draw blood, but enough to leave a 4" scrape about an inch wide.

Me: I'm thrilled he was adventurous enough to be playing, climbing, like a boy should, being outside instead of playing video games or watching TV, and he's prefectly fine. Didn't even cry, just asked my Dad is he was bleeding!

My wife: she figures if my Mom had seen that mark on his neck after something WE had exposed him to, she'd have made my wife feel like an unfit Mother, putting him in danger, exposing to things that were dangerous... and I couldn't disagree, but the shoe was on the other foot. I genuinely believe my Mom felt bad, but was masking it by playing tough, saying my son was real grown up for handling it bravely.

My mother-in-law: She freaked. "OMG, he could have poked his eye out, could have ripped his neck open, that could have been really bad, he's lucky it wasn't worse..." on and on. I could have killed her, this was all right in front of him.. NOTHING HAPPENED! Dont' get him all scared and excited about it!!!

Bottom line, it's all perspective... I hope you're OK with the way everything all played out... I can see it being easy to blame youself, but please don't...

[StarGate]

My son hurt himself worse than that (37 stitches), with me standing about 35 ft. away. Accidents are going to happen whether you are there or not. I don't see anything wrong with leaving either of them alone like you did and especially not for that short of time. 3 of us raised by my single mom and we were left alone all day at a much younger age and we survived with all of our appendages.

[airforce1]

Hey Mike!
Your son might be a candidate for Navy!
Sorry he got hurt and your experience will likely be good to help him grow up to be a strong man.
37 stiches is ugly, we often just use glue and tape now (not kidding, btw)
Sounds like "you're the DAD!" Good for you.

[airforce1]

Originally Posted by jeffs99vulcan

It can happen in a split second, let alone 15 minutes. But I strongly believe you can't live your life worrying about what "could" happen. Be as responsible as you can be, and that will reduce as much circumstance as possible, but unless you put them in a bubble...

Case in point, my parents had our boys this weekend... they live on a hobby farm and the kids (5 and 7-1/2) LOVE it there, and I think the exposure to it is GREAT for them... they know more about farming than any kids in their classes...

This weekend, my Dad had them out helping fell trees, and cut and pile the wood (doing only the things that kids that age can do), and the youngest was climbing in a pile of branches... he slipped and scraped his neck on a twig... not enough to draw blood, but enough to leave a 4" scrape about an inch wide.

Me: I'm thrilled he was adventurous enough to be playing, climbing, like a boy should, being outside instead of playing video games or watching TV, and he's prefectly fine. Didn't even cry, just asked my Dad is he was bleeding!

My wife: she figures if my Mom had seen that mark on his neck after something WE had exposed him to, she'd have made my wife feel like an unfit Mother, putting him in danger, exposing to things that were dangerous... and I couldn't disagree, but the shoe was on the other foot. I genuinely believe my Mom felt bad, but was masking it by playing tough, saying my son was real grown up for handling it bravely.

My mother-in-law: She freaked. "OMG, he could have poked his eye out, could have ripped his neck open, that could have been really bad, he's lucky it wasn't worse..." on and on. I could have killed her, this was all right in front of him.. NOTHING HAPPENED! Dont' get him all scared and excited about it!!!

Bottom line, it's all perspective... I hope you're OK with the way everything all played out... I can see it being easy to blame youself, but please don't...

Unfortunately, sometimes, the M-inLaw's job seems to be to make the S-in law look like and idiot.
I've never understood completely what to do when the freakout starts, I've tried to yell, to be quiet, to be reasonable, but the mind of (this) man is evidently not equipped to find a reasonable and timely solution to the squeaking noise. I'm grateful that there's not more estrogen in my house.
(Flames anticipated, this should have been an email.)
So, ya gonna get your kid a 'scoot someday?

[mcneese5]

Like others have said it happens and thats just the boy in him. I can tell some storys with my 5 kids lol. Dont beat yourself up though.

[StarGate]

Originally Posted by airforce1

Hey Mike!
Your son might be a candidate for Navy!
Sorry he got hurt and your experience will likely be good to help him grow up to be a strong man.
37 stiches is ugly, we often just use glue and tape now (not kidding, btw)
Sounds like "you're the DAD!" Good for you.

Well he's 21 now and recently made an attempt to join the military but they turned him down. Said he's overweight at 6'3" 226 lbs. The boy is not fat trust me. He started life at 2.5 lbs (3 month premature), but put in lots of hours in the weight room druing HS football. I guess they are looking for skin and bones candidates these days.

Some of those stitches were internal (really bad cut on the leg). I've heard about that glue before but never seen it used. I'm always cutting myself, wonder if they'll ever make it available to the public.

[xcgates]

Heh, accidents happen, boys will be boys, I even broke my arm in my church as a kid, right in front of the pastor's wife. Who just happened to be a visiting nurse, and was smart enough to insist I get to the hospital. I was SURE I'd be all right after resting.

Things will happen, even if you are 10 ft away, and looking at them, you won't be able to catch them. Then imagine they are off at a camp, at college/job/alone time, people need to be able to take care of themselves at some point. My parent's quickly established me with my own med insurance card, and an attitude to not tell them if I have been hurt unless I have A)taken care of it, or B)there is actually something they can do about it at that time.

[Neverdun]

Mine was playing with a nerf dart gun and the dart went behind the couch. He dove behind the couch to get it but there was a window there. He went thru the eindow and his shoulder and back was lacerated to the bone. He had to have over 80 stitches inside and out. He's still got some good scars over that one and hates glass because of it.
Don't knock yourself over it. Like everyone says boys are boys and thats never gonna change.

[Granny]

$hit happens mate, he will learn from it and had the frame of mind to call for help from another source. Even if you were there it could happen.

[jeffs99vulcan]

Originally Posted by airforce1

Unfortunately, sometimes, the M-inLaw's job seems to be to make the S-in law look like and idiot.
I've never understood completely what to do when the freakout starts, I've tried to yell, to be quiet, to be reasonable, but the mind of (this) man is evidently not equipped to find a reasonable and timely solution to the squeaking noise. I'm grateful that there's not more estrogen in my house.
(Flames anticipated, this should have been an email.)
So, ya gonna get your kid a 'scoot someday?

LOL! Not sure! I've thought that might be a possibility since the day I got mine, and the two kids are polar opposites so there's a pretty good likelihood at least ONE will!!! For that reason more than any other, I talk a lot about safety, and the importance of it... if they do, I'm trying to make sure they do it right!! And man, I hope it's a cruiser!!!

[stefano]

Sheesh, sorry to hear about your son's mishap, dislocated knees ain't pretty, though at his age, he should be able to recover 100%.

Having said that, and seeing that he is ok (except for the knee, of course!) I have to say that this:

Originally Posted by predfan2001

I thought I had my cell phone in my pocket but actually it was a folding allen wrench set

struck me as hillarious Boys and their toys...

Anyways, as others have said, don't be hard on yourself, it could have just as easily happened had you been in the house, it was just coincidence that you weren't there. You should be proud of him for handling the situation the way he did. Maybe now he's also learned not to jump off his bed, you'd think at 15 he'd have grown out of that phase already

My partner has an 11-year old, and I keep pushing the idea that she stays at home on her own after school - she normally stays with her grandparents who live right above us in an apartment building, but, for reasons I won't get into here, I don't believe they are a good influence on her.

It took me a while to convince my partner that her daughter is old enough to stay in the house by herself... God help us when the time will come to communicate that to the mother-in-law...

Like I said, don't be hard on yourself, keep leaving your kids at home, the risks are the same. Just chalk this one up to a learning experience for your son!

[Averitteg]

Kids will be kids and kids will hurt themselves...it's all a part of growing up. Glad to hear he's good though.